The Dreaded House

I have to stop going out in public

Every time I see anyone I know, they say, “How’s the kitchen renovation going?”

It’s like when you’re pregnant and huge and someone asks your due date and you tell them and they go, “Oh…You still have a while….” Yeah.

What I really want to say is, “Remember what it’s like to have that first poop after you’ve had a baby?” To which most women will say, “Oh, god…yes?”

It’s like that. Continue reading “I have to stop going out in public”