Depression · Inspiration

I can’t BRAIN today.

Before I begin, here’s a BIG DISCLAIMER: this is not a cry for help, or a RED FLAG, or a whine for pity. This is just me relating through writing, my latest stumble, my glitch, my little detour off the rails.

Maybe someone reading this will say, “Oh, my gosh – ME TOO!” Maybe not. But I think those of us who live with some forms of mental illness, like depression or anxiety, or with brain differences that challenge us, like ADHD or dyslexia, must all go through these times when we just get tired of holding it together, exhausted from checking and rebuilding that scaffolding that holds up our lives. We get tired of making sure our medication is filled, and our responsibilities are all logged on our calendars with multiple reminders. We stumble, and stuff starts falling through the cracks. Continue reading “I can’t BRAIN today.”

Inspiration · Politics

The cold bothers me a little.

I am not the only person in my city, my state, my country – far from it – who feels the urgent need to DO and SAY things about what is happening to democracy in America. I must have five books piled on my sofa, and five more on my iPad, that explain, from one perspective or another, how and why the United States got into the current state of extreme inequality and ideological polarization.

It is not hard to see the problem. I do what most say not to do and read the comments after political articles, particularly those in my local newspaper. Under anonymous screen names, people do not hold back their anger, fear and bias. They seem both glibly unaware of the seriousness of the divide, the threat to democracy, and yet deeply fearful in a “gut” instinct way that what we hold dear and how we always expected things to go is slipping away. The lashing, labeling, knee-jerk prejudice is disheartening.

Our elected leaders do and say things that leave me dumbstruck and sick.

What to do? Write? Volunteer? Donate? Lead? Follow? I am almost frozen into inactivity with the urgency to do something about the world, against the enormity of our slide – or free fall – into something that does not resemble a nation “of the people.”

I am one person, but one person can do something. Today, I read and learn; write and plan; collect information and analyze it; donate to one worthwhile cause. It is enough for today.